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Friday, May 17, 2013

First Year of Marriage--not always the easiest...

This is not my daughter, nor is this the dress she wore.
I just couldnt find a picture of her dress,
 this one looked pretty nice so I am sharing...

My daughter will be married one year this weekend. It has gone really fast for me, probably it has for her too. It does seem like only yesterday she was trying on wedding dresses and tasting wedding cakes. ( I am not going to lie, loved the cake tasting part...)

While I am only an observer of her journey this last year, I clearly remember my journey through my first year of marriage, almost thirty-five years ago.

This is the place, but it was covered in snow.

We were married Thanksgiving weekend in 1978. It was cold, clear and sunny. There had been a recent snowfall  so the ground looked very picturesque. Our reception was held at a local prep school that had once been a mansion to a meat packing mogel.

Wayside Inn, where we were snowed in.

We honeymooned in New England, we were snowed in at a country inn and were barely able to get back home due to weather.

I love being married, but truly, it was a growth opportunity. (Still is.) When we arrived to the apartment we  rented, it was the first time in my life I lived away from home.  The first night there, I felt like I had just spent the night at someone's house and I could hardly wait to go home.

That first year was one of many adjustments:

1. Remembering quarters for the washing machine.(oddly, my mother's machine did not take quarters...)
2. Everything had to be dragged upstairs. (groceries, laundry, furniture, yourself at the end of a long day)
3. I was the one responsible for keeping the "house". (Luckily, I had some good training,thanks Mom!)
4. I was slightly overwhelmed. (Truthfully, frequently still am.)
5. I missed living in a house with a yard and neighbors I knew. (Only four apartments in the building all occupied by snowbirds, so that first winter, I was alone in the building all day)

I think arguing was what we did best the first year. Some might say, we were working out the kinks of what would (hopefully) become a team, instead of two individuals.

I think it is a unique time in one's life, it is the first real inkling of self-sacrifice. It is; frustrating, fabulous and filled with hope and some of the most worthwhile work I have have been a part of.

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